sometimes for just one minute.. i want to enter your mind.. and find out what your thinking.. i get so hopeful and then i try not to think about it at all.. i wonder if you ever think of me.. like i of you.

Writing cause i’m too nervous to know what else to do while I wait… I completely feel you all around me.. the feeling i get when look at you tumbler.. when i read your facebook messages.. that mysterious feeling i get when i think about things that you do.. your life. How mysterious it is too me.. how special you are to me still.. My stomach hurts.. this is so wrong on my end.. I’ve never felt this way before.. I hope I can conclude this feeling by tonight this feeling of falling so deeply for you.. This difference in my life and yours.. You fill a layer within me that i cannot explain. I tried to leave it alone and forget about  it but it keeps coming back and its killing me…

i feel so poetic..a Violin song is playing and my heart is bursting.. wanting to reach out and hold you. this feeling this difference.. I hate it.. i Love it maybe i shouldn’t have come.

Still haunted by our coincidental meeting.. this fateful meeting the one that i Love… the meeting that i can’t stop thinking about.. What I thought i buried is slowly surfacing.. a secret i can only share with myself.. Why am i so fucking complicated inside? Do i mean anything do you? When I see you I want to hug you for a long time..Now i’m wondering what you are feeling for me.. nothing maybe? I hope not.. though knowing that would help, it would also tear me apart inside.. i’m in too deep in an instant and i can’t control it.. i want you to care about me… I want to be  “at your doorstep” again.. I miss opening my Itouch and seeing you left me a message.. I miss you.. I miss our messages… I miss visiting you at work.. i tried to stop myself from going cause i was trying to bury this….

Now that i think about it.. I layed eyes on you before i ever fell in Love with anyone else.. it was you who I saw.. you gave me such a strong feeling that i had to take action.. i was unable to hold back.. Then i didn’t see you again.. I never thought I would.. your unbelievable beauty is still unrivaled in my heart.. your uniqueness.. your hug… unrivaled.. When you first hugged me I could have died happy.. as your buried your head  in my chest for those few seconds.. 

i see you now.. i don’t want to look your direction afraid my heart will melt. i want you to notice me.. and approach me.. my breathing grows heavy i’m unsure where to look just keep looking down at my itouch writing endlessly. is my hair right? my smile? will i be okay? this anticipation is killing me.. i feel even if i do greet you i will want to stay near your side and it will be very awkward. Everyone else seems to be mingling fine but i’m sitting afraid to move.

I want to hug you and then take you hand and kiss it I can’t decided which to do first.

Just hugged you after the show. my heart beating a million miles an hour.. i started asking questions but you seemed really bust so i just decided to make it easy and leave you alone for now =P

i shouldn’t be thinking of you this way.. but it seems i always have I believe I always will… your the first person to give me this feeling.. i can’t stop thinking about you…

I feel insignifigant to you… It’s really hard to tell anything at all… I mean I’m not saying I should even be signifigant to you at this point because I have not done much. But do you think of me? Do you want me to do more things? Or would you just be weirded out if I did do them? I just want to be close to you and know you a lot bette… To spend time and make irriplaceable memories. Too take your bad feelings away….. I don’t know why your so signifigant to me but you are.. And I feel kinda helpless..